Life Can Change In The Blink of An Eye

"At any point in your life you can walk away, fly away, drive away. You can completely change your life in an instant. If you want to."

Who would have thought that ten months would escape me as fast as they have. And who could have imagined how much life would change! Needless to say, in these last ten months, I have done all of those things mentioned in that quote.

I have walked away from bad situations, questionable relationships, and unsure educational opportunities. Yet, at the same time, I haven't gone anywhere. I have stayed in the small town of Quincy instead of heading back to college or to Chile to teach English. Of ALL of my ideas, Heavenly Father has (thanks heavens) guided me to...well, here. "Grow where you are planted." That's exactly what I'm doing! Literally. In Quincy haha.

I have flown away! To LOTS of places! Chicago, Iowa, Albuquerque, Utah, and (the best one yet) Mexico! And let me tell you...Those were some of the best trips ever. No worries, I'll go into more detail about all of this! :D

And I have definitely driven away! LOTS of trips to Moses Lake, several to Seattle/Tacoma, a couple to Rexburg, and a few more to the temples in Spokane, Tri-Cities, and Seattle. LOTS of driving.

And, best of all, I have made some drastic changes to my life. (:

(Note: To any reading this, it is rather lengthy haha. But I'm writing it more for myself to have later on, but feel free to read on! :P )

Let's start with January! I was working as a substitute para professional all through December, but I had found out that the In-School Suspension teacher from the high school was going to be moving. I worried about applying, because I wasn't planning on staying after this year. I planned on going back to Rexburg after June/July. But I decided to apply anyways with some encouragement from my boss! I had the interview, and I did mention that I wasn't planning on staying...Annnd I was NOT offered the position...But the Lord definitely has a way of making things work out in His way haha. Oddly, I was not particularly worried. They asked me to fill the position for about 2 weeks until the REAL person they hired could start. Well, they changed the work schedule. The new lady turned the job down. Sooo I was hired! And thanks heavens! Because for some odd reason, the Lord just knew I would end up sticking around here for a bit. :D

January was sort of the month where I figured it all out. I was finally feeling confident in what I would be doing (working, saving, and then heading back to school in June or so!), and I was optimistic about being strong and obedient and loving life...Also, near the end of the month, a young man walked into the picture, all the way from Tennessee.

February...So this young man came to Quincy to work for a while. I met him at institute, and he wanted to start carpooling to institute. It was pretty fun, and hanging out with him and Aleen Guerra (now Aleen Hyer!) was a blast. So we sort of began dating, but I felt extremely unsure about dating him. Especially since it was possible he would be getting sent back to Utah for work. Despite the fact that Mom and Dad loved the guy, and he was really fun, this is where I decided to walk away. Sure enough, two days after I decided to not get more involved, he was called back to Utah. Listo. Ya. Walked away. Moved on.

After reading through my journal a bit, it sounds like March was full of scripture study, personal reflections, and inner peace--knowing that I was making the right choices. Even though I wasn't 100% sure about anything at this point, I wasn't stressed out or worried. I just knew things would work out. (And, oh, how they have! :) ...) I MUST share one hilarious thing that I had gotten out of Stake Conference, though. The Stake President unexpectedly asked 3 young men who were preparing to serve missions to go up and share their testimonies. The three walk up, and the last one to share his testimony stands up and says, "So President just asked us to come up and bear our testimonies...I'm not going to lie. My eyes were closed, and I don't have my shoes on!...Good morning!" Hahahaha! We all died laughing, and everyone up on the stand immediately started busting up even more after glancing down at his feet. Sure enough! He only had socks on haha.

Also in March we moved to Cherlyn's! And I must admit that I am SO grateful that I had that chance to live with her. She may be my cousin who lives just on the other side of town, but I hardly knew her. Now as I sat next to her in church today, we giggled and chatted about life and plans. :) I love her to death. Anywho, yes. I focused a lot on scripture study and prayer during this month, wanting to make sure that I was making the right decisions. And I can't describe the peace that I felt. Something little that I wrote in my journal: "This peace does not come from the outside world, my job, institute, etc. It comes from somewhere deep inside. It is just this strong and solid, yet comfortable and quiet, assurance that everything is okay. I may not be insanely righteous and perfect, but I do my best. I may not make a lot of money; my softball team may have gotten slaughtered yesterday; I may not have all my schooling done; and I may not be married...But everything will be okay." ..I was so wise! I should take my own advice. I need that kind of patience and feeling that everything will work out in the time of the Lord! :P

This was also in the early Spring, which was when SOFTBALL STARTED! Well I was working a somewhat funky schedule (7:30-5:00, Mon-Thurs), so I went to practice for just a little bit each day, but it was worth it. Anywho, a fellow coach mentioned WGU for schooling--all online, basically. And I really liked the idea! So I looked into it, and I was going to change to Math Education, but something kept holding me back. Whether it was work, softball, or indecisiveness I'm not sure, but I did nothing with it. I just continued to research it.

Well, General Conference weekend/Spring Break in April lead me to taking a trip to Utah and Rexburg...

Driving to Seattle to go to the airport! Mom joined me for the day to go eat delicious sushi!

Probably the most beautiful shot I had ever seen on a plane...

I first spent several days with Kelsey, Keatn, and their dogs in Rexburg!

Then it was off to Salt Lake City!! I was able to see a ton of companions and even get to see and hug my amazing mission president and wife, who came all the way from Buenos Aires!

Like the pictures show, I mostly went to visit some friends. But I also wanted to make a trip to the temple there...And oddly, as I walked around campus and reacquainted myself with everything, I wasn't feeling so excited or great about the idea of returning to Rexburg. I LOVE the school, but I don't know. When I went to the temple, I got to reading a little bit. Take a read through Doctrine & Covenants 111 with the question, "Where should I go?" Especially after verse 3 haha. "Therefore, it is expedient that you should form acquaintance with men in this city, as you should be led, and as it shall be given you." Haha I just about died laughing in the temple. Well I felt I needed to stay in Quincy for a while is what I got to thinking...So I started looking into online schooling and making hints to my boss that I was thinking about sticking around for a while longer, like at least another year...

I decided that the best way to "form acquaintance with men" was by going to the Young Single Adult ward, despite the fact that I wasn't a huge fan of the idea haha. But BOY does the Lord know how to lead and guide! On probably the second or third week of attending the YSA ward, a tall, dark, and handsome Mexican had flown to Washington to visit his mission!

September to December!

Okay, this is going to be like PURE photos!! These are quick updates of our adventures from September 2014 to December 2014. And thennn I already have two other posts ready for this year's adventures. ;)

OCTOBER! We celebrated Madre's 53rd birthday!! It was quite an adventure stealing her from work. ;) I also took the motorcycle class, so I learned to ride a motorcycle! I also got stuck on the side of the freeway, so Padre and Uncle Todd had to come and save me. :D Haha.

November!!! I was FINALLY able to see Dene', Trista, and their families!! I can't believe I've been on so many planes since I've been home haha. But I flew from Seattle to Chicago, Chicago to Iowa, where I stayed for a good week or so...

          

We even got to pick out a tree and put it up!! :D

Annnd the cheapest flight to Albuquerque was on Thanksgiving Day, so this was my Thanksgiving dinner! :D

But no worries, but I thoroughly enjoyed another week and a half with another sister and brother in-law and niece and nephew. :D

They're so cute. :)

I even got to visit my fellow Argentines!! :D The Cornu-Labats! Ah, how wonderful it was to drink mate with them and speak to them in vos! :D

After coming home, I continued to work as a para pro at several different schools, so this kid just kind of summed up how much fun it was haha. And I also got to visit a past FHE brother from BYU-Idaho since we had both just come home from our missions!

Stay updated for the wonderful adventures of 2015!!

300: Tolerance. Acceptance. Love.

These three words would be considered synonyms, but they still have completely different meanings--especially when you include them all in a discussion about the legalization of gay marriage. In my Marriage 300 class this week, we kept our focus on the debate about gay marriage. I have to admit that I was a little worried about this topic! Most know by now that The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints has made an official stand on this subject, despite not usually getting involved in politics. Although we do not endorse nor support the legalization of gay marriage, we are exhorted to love all and not judge. For everyone is passing through their own storm. This topic got me even more worried, though, because I know that even though the Church leaders have taken a stand on this, the members are still allowed to have their own opinions and make their own choices, of course. I know there are members that support gay marriage, and so I was curious as to how this would pan out in our class discussions this week. Thank heavens everything worked out just fine; we were all able to keep ourselves composed and respect one another's opinions. The discussions and reading material actually opened my eyes a TON.

I will admit that I feel extremely informed about why it is that many people support gay marriage; they have their own very valid reasons. Many people whom I admire support gay marriage, and I've had many opportunities to listen and understand their point of view. It. Makes. Sense. But regardless, I was never (and will never) be able to deny what I know to be true and right. Unfortunately, before this week, I was never very informed as to HOW I could defend my side of the debate. I don't ever look to get into an argument; firstly because it's childish and unneeded. We don't need to handle disagreements by continuing to argue about it. Secondly, because I know I would lose! I get all tongue-tied in debates :) Nevertheless, I want to not only be able to declare what I believe, but also why I believe what I do!

I won't go into really juicy complicated details, but I do want to share one, big thing. The family is the basic and central unit to life and the Gospel. Legalization of gay marriage is not simply expanding what marriage means. It is a complete redefinition of the word. In the Federal Marriage Amendment, marriage is described as the union between a man and a woman. Now think about it: WHY has marriage been considered only between a man and a woman for so long? First off, if you're religious, because that is how God first instilled marriage, beginning with Adam and Eve. Second, because what is the purpose of marriage? Yes, to unite a man and woman to be able to multiply and replenish the earth. Yes, everyone, that commandment, along with marriage, is STILL in full force today. Unfortunately, if we endorse gay marriage, how are we to expect this couple to fulfill both commandments and receive all the blessings? They biologically are unable to reproduce. Fact is fact. And if we change this definition of marriage, saying that anyone who loves each other is legal to marry...To what extent does this go? Who is to say that in ten years we won't want to change it again allowing more than just two people in the union (polygamy), or even incest. It may seem like a strange and foreign idea to you now, but is that not how the idea of gays or lesbians began 10+ years ago, as well?

You may ask me, "But why do you even care? It's not like it affects you. Just let people be people, and let them marry and love whomever they want." And, you know what? For a long time, I thought the exact same, "But why is it such a big deal? I'm still allowed to marry my handsome man, how does it affect me?" Well let's take our morals and values about marriage back 50 years ago. Baby boomers! Not only were people having children, but in the early 1900's, marriage was well sought after. Most men and women married young and had bigger families. Then we slowly started to introduce new factors. Education pursuits and establishing a solid career became extremely important, so men and women began to wait longer to marry and have children. Then children almost became a burden and, yes, are expensive, so families became smaller. Then our morals began dropping drastically. Premarital sex became far more popular, which leads to child-bearing out of wedlock, which can also lead to abortion at times. Then cohabitation became normal; many studies have found that a couple will cohabitate mainly to satisfy their own needs, but very few actually plan on having children. Although our population is still rising, it is slowing down. Due to smaller families, abortions, marrying later on in life, or not having any children, period, the world's population is expected to begin to decrease within the next 50 years if we don't turn something around. We will face depopulation. Gay marriage goes right along with "not having any children". Yes, they can adopt, but they themselves cannot reproduce and have children.

And not only that, but it has been shown in various studies that a child has great advantages by being raised by a mother and a father together. In fact, having both examples and influences on them is crucial and vital to their growth and development. This is my belief and what I know to be right according to my knowledge and understanding. And if a gay couple intends to infringe on my religious beliefs and rights to refuse to make their cake (or whatever else the case our there might be), the table has been completely turned. It is no longer me being intolerant (because I DO tolerate it, even if I choose to not condone it; I will not mistreat a gay couple) of your sexual orientation; it is that couple being intolerant of my religious beliefs. We are free to live however we may choose to, but our government should not be used to punish those who choose differently.

Tolerance.
Acceptance.
Love.

I will be tolerant! But I should not be forced to accept a certain opinion or belief. Elder Dallin H. Oaks said, “Tolerance does not require abandoning one’s standards or one’s opinions on political or public policy choices. Tolerance is a way of reacting to diversity, not a command to insulate it from examination.”

I will not abandon my belief; I will stand strong. Nor will I push it down another's throat if they disagree. But I WILL follow the greatest commandment given from God to man: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart...And...thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." (Matthew 22:37-39) I WILL love you and do my best to show you that pure love.

"Love the sinner; hate the sin."

I encourage all to study out the doctrine and facts and not simply go with the flow of the crowd or media. Decide for yourself, and stand by it, whatever it may be.

"Too often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought." ~John F. Kennedy

Marriage 300: My Testimony on Marriage

This month I am taking a huge…Risk? I’m not positive if “risk” is the right word for it, but I will say that I am taking one big bite of life to chew on right now. I have a couple of other rough drafts that I need to get posted (preferably within the next five days haha) to update you all on how I’ve done and what I have been up to. But to really quickly explain this “big bite of life”: I am engaged! To my most favorite Mexican ever, Adonai ;) And we are in the middle of doing all sorts of paperwork and junk to get his fiancé visa so that we can get married. I’m also working full-time at the high school, AND starting this month I have also started school through BYU-Idaho again. Except this will be the first time since I’ve been home from my mission to go to school full-time again! ALL online. And I was lucky enough to be hired on as a junior high volleyball coach! So life is pretty busy, but you should be hearing lots more updates on my blog now. J

Why? For one of my Marriage and Family Studies classes, I am to write an online blog post about principles and topics that we have learned each week! So yes, many of these will be about church topics, trials or challenges with marriage and family, and even viewpoints from the world around us about marriage and family. On here I am simply sharing my thoughts, insights, and principles that I am learning. If you disagree or have a different idea or even an answer to a question I have, please feel free to comment and explain/answer! I would love it.

So, for this week, we have talked a lot about trends and patterns in marriages, families, and how the world and Church views both. Throughout all of the readings that we were assigned this week, there was one, huge theme that stood out to me. We read a couple of talks by Elder Oaks and Elder Faust, but neither mentioned this theme I’m going to write about, in their talks; but it was mostly found in two of the other readings. The pinch of bluntness that is in me which I've accrued over time is screaming "Hypocrites!", while my much more dominating soft side reminds me, "You were raised differently. Some simply may not understand."

Let me start this all off with a story…I remember when I was younger, I was having a conversation with another student at from school. We were discussing marriage and cohabitation (living together before marriage), and they mentioned that they planned to live with their significant other for at least one year before getting married. I was a little surprised, so out of curiosity, I asked them why. This was the first time I heard the reasoning, "I want to get a feel for what it will be like being married to them before I make that kind of commitment. I need to make sure I can live with that person first! If I can't live with that person for one year, how can I expect to live with them for many more years? For a lifetime?"

In absolute honesty, I did not know how to respond. Why? Because I had always been taught that cohabitation was NOT okay. Under any circumstance, it is not okay...Yet I didn't know how to respond to my classmate, because their reasoning legitimately made sense to me. That student and their reasoning for cohabitation made perfect sense. It's like a science experiment, right? Question: Should I marry this person? Hypothesis: This relationship is a good one. I am happy, and I believe I can be happy with this other person. I would then proceed to test my hypothesis through an experiment (living with them for a year), and then draw a conclusion. If the conclusion is good, DEAL! We get married. If it is bad, re-test! With a new variable, of course. That being a different person. It seems as though it would work. SHOULD work...But let me tell you, although science has answered many of our questions and absolutely amazes me, unfortunately, science does not always have the answers. Not yet, at least. Science is always progressing and changing and making new hypotheses as it finds more answers and new information. And for this reason, I don't rely wholly on science. I rely on the One who knows it all, without fail.

God does not change. And the Law of Chastity (meaning the law that God has given to His children concerning their reproductive powers to create families and marriage—for more information see "The Family: A Proclamation to the World") certainly will not change. For this purpose, I have been taught all my life that living together with a significant other before marriage is not okay. Even though I did not fully know how to respond to the other student's views at the time, I have now come to learn why AND have been able to see scientific evidence as to why their "hypothesis" or reasoning is skewed.

While reading through several of our assigned material, I was continuously amazed at how many people said that a happy marriage and family life is "extremely important" to them, yet so few were willing to take the appropriate steps to have a stable marriage and family life. Many have seen divorce rates climb higher and higher and are fearful to marry. Many don’t even want to have children. And for those who do but prefer cohabitatation instead of marriage, they want to provide stability for their children, but by having their children out of wedlock, they are failing to provide that stability! Couples who cohabitate are more likely to split up, because no, they don’t have that vital commitment of legal marriage tying them together. So if they do have children while living together, it’s possible that their children grow up in a single-parent home. And I believe very few would disagree that a mother or father attempting to raise a children (or multiple children) is a grand struggle in and of itself.

So the majority of people said that a happy marriage and family life is extremely important to them, but then after reading some more, very few believe that legal marriage will lead to a fuller and happier life. There is where it finally dawned on me. These people who say that marriage and family stability is so important truly do believe that, and they WANT that in their future. Unfortunately, it’s possible that they simply lack the knowledge of how to make that come true. They haven’t seen the statistics of marriage versus cohabitation, especially while raising children. They don't realize that by cohabitating, they are more likely to split up, because there IS NO commitment. There is no reason for them to stay together if things get rough. It is so easy to walk away, and unfortunately, like I mentioned, that often happens. I do realize that there are strong couples that are faithful to each other while cohabitating, but even then it makes you wonder, “If you plan to stay faithful to one another and plan to stay together for the rest of your lives…Why not marry?”

While conversing with my classmate, I may not have understood the "why" all those years ago, but I did know (and I DO know to this day) that marriage is sacred. I am not married (yet!), but it is something to special that I have chosen to only share this commitment and experience with one person. It is not easy, but I will do my part as best I can to make it work. I will stay faithful and true to my husband and to God. There are so many benefits to legal marriage, not only physically and economically, but also spiritually. God gives no law that is only temporal or only spiritual. They will always go hand in hand.

"So...How was your mission?"

"Uhh wow, it was GREAT..."

Really?? Is that even a question? Or here's a better one:

"Tell me about some of your experiences in Argentina."

There are NO words to answer such questions...A mission is 18 months to two YEARS long. In a place where your heart learns to call home. With people that somehow become your own, adopted family. Missionaries have spiritual experiences on a daily basis, and it is impossible to adequately respond to such questions. Let alone share those experiences that are most dear to our hearts...

So I was not expecting to start off my first blog post after the mission quite like this. I didn't really plan on it being three whole months after having returned home, either. I never imagined it would be so...hard. Difficult. Heart-wrenching. I feel a little bad for my parents, because they've been the ones around during the whole transition, and they will probably be the first ones to say that it has not been easy--for me OR them.

I've always known that missions can change people. I know it's not a guarantee, but I've always known that a young man or woman who is set out to give their all to the Lord and His children for 18 to 24 months has the ability to completely change. However, for some indescribable reason, I thought that I would be different. HA...Yeah, no. Before my mission, I thought I had it all figured out and that I was ready for everything. To finish school, start a career, get married, have a family...I learned on the mission how wrong I was. Sure, I probably could have made it. But I know for a fact that every single one of those things--the schooling, career, marriage, family, and MORE--will go much smoother and much different and much more Gospel-focused than ever before.

So like I was saying...My parents had a pretty good idea of who I was before my mission. And it's not as though I've changed entirely. But I have indeed changed, and they've been on a roller coaster, trying to figure it all out and HOW to handle it. (;

I'll just say that these last few months have been a lot harder than I ever imagined they would be. On the mission sometimes you just gush about how much you miss taking naps and doing absolutely NOTHING and never having to do another weekly planning...But then you are forced to leave it all behind. I would give anything to sit down on one of those awful folding chairs for hours on end to do a weekly planning session just one more time. To put that scuffed up tag on just once more and be a set apart servant of the Lord. I don't think a day goes by without me thinking to myself at least once, "Just take me back to Argentina...". Not one single day. Argentina is always on my mind. We are told to not be "that returned missionary" who only ever talks about their mission, but do you realize how HARD that is??? We're having a conversation, and the ONLY experiences I've had for the last 18 months are not allowed to be mentioned? Sorry. Not happening. I try to not go on and on, story after story haha. But I'm not just leaving half my heart behind like that.

How do you get over it? GREAT question. My parents once told me that I should write a book for returned missionaries about how to transition back. The problem with that is that I still have NO IDEA how to do so! I still cry about Argentina every now and then! Hahaha. Not in public, of course. (; However, I can tell you a few things that have helped me. They come straight from Presidente Goates' final interview with us missionaries. It all comes down to doing the basics. Not losing that structure we have as missionaries. I'll probably get into that in another blog post, so I'll just leave it at that. Do the basics, my friends. Read the scriptures, talk with your Heavenly Father, serve others, go to the temple and church...Y'know. All that good stuff. (: Always be working towards a goal, or else you're just sitting there completely dormant. Not moving forward.

Okay, that was my Rant&Rage for the night. (: You all know that a lot has gone down in these last 3 months. I am SO incapable of writing it all out, but luckily I've got the realllly important stuff written in my journals for my posterity. :P Haha. So I've decided to give you a brief summary of what I've gone around doing lately. (: Lots of traveling and visiting people and just fun stuff. SO...Get ready for the next post, because it is going to be LOADED with photos from after the mission. (: For now, here are the last of my photos from the heartbreaking departure from San Rafael and all of the incredible people there...

The classiest woman alive, Alicia Ochoa.

Mendoza sunsets...On our way to Malargue for my last exchanges as Sister Training Leader.

The last P-day! Spent with some great missionaries, laughing, eating, and just loving the mission life.

A glorious family we were able to visit in Malargue. (:

She recently just got baptized with her siblings. Future missionary, yo!

Celebrating my 18-month mark, Japa's year mark, and Bentley's 6-months mark. (;

La familia Bernardeau (: Greatest investigators of my life...

My favoritest little Segura boy (:

Raquel Segura's family. (: They have the most amazing story...

Andreaaa (: My last lunch with a fabulous member!

My last day in San Rafael...With Damian Balmaceda. (:

Renzo Ibañez! Great new member of my life. (:

I've just got this love for all those darling young women. (: Such incredible gals.

Haha what a ward mission leader. (: Hermano Bustos and his wonderful wife.

One of my favorite families. :D La familia Ortiz!

Oh Lourdes (: I met her just the day before. She came to church my last week. She is full of miracles and love and...so much more. (:

Familia Pastor!!! Vamos Racing! (;

Hno. Ortiz and his cute little pregnant wife. (: Now THEY have a cute love story! (;

The Martinez women (: Anita and her mom. Best milanesas in town!

These two are like my best friends, no joke haha. Them two plus the sister missionaries? Talk about power houses. (; Debra and Ana. (:

Bishop Galdeano and his cute little fam. (:

Familia Miranda! Ice cream. Always ice creammm. (:

...It was time to get on the bus and say goodbyes...All of the hermanas in the whole zone came...I miss them so much.

Pulling out on the colectivo bus...

And our final goodbyes...

I bawled the whole 3 hours to Mendoza Centro.

The end.

Stay tuned for the party at Presidente's house and the plane flight home and hugging my family for the first time in 18 months! :D